Friday’s Focal Point - Beer Snobs
One of the things that prompted me to start his blog (other than the fact I like American beer and Mark wanted me to), was the back that those in the Craft Beer Movement seem to be trying to but beer on the same level as wine.
Now listen, I have been to a few winery’s. I have seen Sideways. I personally don’t get off on doing the old sniff, swirl, swoosh, sip just a bit, then spit into a big nasty fucking bucket. If I find a wine I like, I buy it and drink it. Thats it. I really don’t get down with the whole wine and food or wine and cheese tastings. Just not my bag. However now a days, Craft beer fan seems to be trying to put beer in the same catagory as wine.
A good friend of mine Mark Tichenor writes for Beercraft. This is a print column in a local fish rag as well as a frequently updated website/blog. If you are reading this blog, you were probably referred from his page. Anyway, Mark is a phenomenal writer and dude knows beer. He knows so much about beer it boarders on the line of being almost disturbing! Of coursethat doesn’t mean that I don’t read his columns and blogs because I do. I even try and keep as open a mind as I can when reading another blog about the virtues of Germany’s beer. However where I start to loose focus is usually in his discription of the beer. Most notably when he refers to floral and fruity scents and tastes. Uhm yeah, floral and fruity. Like I said, Mark can flat out write. As I read his discriptions its almost like I have an invisible beer infront of me and I can smell the subtle floral aroma, then like in a bad Kid’n'Play movie I hear the sound of a scratching record as I snap back to reality. We’re talking about a friggin’ beer here and I’m smelling flowers? Come on!!! Not too many things are more manly than beer (well maybe Chuck Norris drinking a beer). Why is it that in this review of a manly beverage am I reading about its fruity aftertones and floral scent? Hang on…Okay, I’m back. I had to check and may sure I still had a package (and yes, its size is rather impressive). As a guy I flat out don’t care about my beer smelling like the bouqet of flowers I had to give my wife the last time I fucked something up. If my beer doesn’t smell like piss, shit, or skunk its probably going to be alright with me. I also don’t need discussions of the fruity nature of my beer. Come on, this is beer, don’t turn it into a glorified Zima.
Taking this all a bit further, now I have been reading (through Mark of course) that a couple of the local bars here in Crapcehster are starting up ye olde beer tastings complete with a plate of cheeses and glorified lunch meats. Another place puts on a sit down meal while they explain which beer should go with what. Okay seriously, this is taking beer snobbery to a whole new level. It’s beer. If you think it tastes good, drink it with that you want! And while I am bashing…don’t get it wrong. I bash because not only do I not “get it”, but because beer snobs like my man Billy-Shan are quick to pile on a person because they like Coors Light and are proud of it. Beer snobbery at its worst son.
Perhaps if Beer Snob could live in harmony with regular beer drinker, there wouldn’t be such a divide. It’s all beer after all. Beer snob has turned into that stuck up cheerleader you used to like in High School. You know the one who was smokin’ hot and could suck a gold ball through a garden hose, however she would look down at you like you were the lowest form of life on earth. As you nod your head…yeah, that bitch. Somehow beer snob look down on those of us that enjoy a frost brewed Coors Light, or an MGD. There is plenty of beer for all of us…even with the hops shortage. I can drink my Miller High Life right along side of someone drinking a Sierra Nevada Pale Ale or a Spatan. I’m good and open minded like that. Come on beer snob, stop the hate!
